Doonesbury Strip

August 2024 ยท 3 minute read

....Trump on Biden: "I kicked that old broken-down pile of crap...He's quitting the race. I got him out of there. That means we have Kamala...She's so bad. She's so pathetic."....Sen. J.D. Vance: "History will remember Joe Biden as not just a quitter, which he is, but as one of the worst presidents in the history of the United States of America. Kamala Harris is a million times worse and everybody knows it."....Rep. Matt Gaetz: "Kamala Harris isn't able to do any job."....Donald Trump Jr.: "She is even more liberal and less competent than Joe, which is really saying something."....Kellyanne Conway: "She does not speak well. She does not work hard."....Rep. Tim Burchett: "One hundred percent she was a DEI hire. When you go down that road, you get mediocrity."....Rep. Harriet Hageman: "Intellectually, just really kind of bottom-of-the-barrel."....Trump on Harris: "Dumb as a rock."....George Takei in response: "Peak Trump. Every accusation is a confession! Trump is so dumb he thinks Hannibal Lecter came from a 'political asylum.'"....Mary L. Trump on her uncle: "His childish nickname for her is 'laughing Kamala' because she feels joy, and joy is something he has never experienced and doesn't understand."....CNN's Van Jones on Gov. Ron Desantis' convention speech: "Sounded like ChatGPT for mean people."....Rep. MTG to British reporter: "You're the cause of President Trump almost being assassinated."....Eric Trump on Dems: "They literally tried to kill him this week."....radio host Joe Rogan on Secret Service: "They have organized assassinations before. And when they organize assassinations, it looks like that."....Rep. Pat Fallon to Secret Service director Kimberly Cheatle at hearing: "Your horrifying ineptitude and your lack of skilled leadership is a disgrace...You should be fired immediately and go back to guarding Doritos."....Rep. MTG on Cheatle: "I've never seen a more incompetent woman in my life...She may be more than incompetent. She may be complicit."....Rep. Nancy Mace to Cheatle at hearing: "You're full of sh*t today...Would you like to use my five minutes to draft your resignation letter?"....Kevin D. Williamson on Vance: "He rails against self-interested billionaires while Peter Thiel scratches him behind the ear."....Vance in 2021: "We are effectively run in this country...by a bunch of childless cat ladies who are miserable at their own lives and the choices they've made. And they want to make the rest of the country miserable too."....Mary L. Trump on her uncle: "In Vance, he found someone who hates women as much as he does; someone who wants to control them as much as he does."....Bette Midler: "Time to ban Viagra, because if pregnancy is 'god's will,' then so is your limp dick."....Garrison Keillor on Trump: "If you saw him a few years ago attempt to comically impersonate the reporter who has cerebral palsy, that is all you need to know about the man. He is not 78, he is 13."....

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